A story of physical healing & overcoming fears.
When I was born I wasn't anywhere near healthy. It was so bad that one of the doctors my parents talked to said in a surprised tone, "Babies like this just don't make it." Because of everything that happened at my birth, I had to be put in a special-ed class. And through that, all sorts of pain was birthed and caused by others just because I was 'different'. Even though that was the case, I naturally looked for opportunities to help others including the ones who hurt me. This began a life of emotional survival; I had to face pain each and every day from pain caused by others and into questioning my own worth.
I was so overwhelmed with hurt and discouragement I tried to take my own life when I was only eight years old. I never attempted it again, but every day since then the thoughts of actually doing it crossed my mind every single day. When I gave my life to Christ, (even though I was already a leader in our youth for nearly six years before that) I made a promise to get real with God. I made a sincere promise to live completely for Him from that day forward. Immediately God called me to serve in student ministry, even though I was the most (un)qualified person for the job. I was so bad that someone I went to high school with, two years into college, told me they thought I was mute because of how quiet I am.
I never felt like anyone cared about me while I grew up as a student, so I promised God I would make sure no other student feels that way. I want them to know they've got at least me and God. There's nothing more important to me than to live for Jesus Christ. I went through all this pain, so I can point my students to Jesus in all their pain and encourage them to never give up like I could have done each day. Even though the pain in my heart of considering taking my life was almost unbearable at times, I wouldn't trade this for anything. When comparing the pain to the love He's asked me to give, which only comes from Him, the pain doesn't come anywhere close to being able to live my life for Christ. There's absolutely nothing more important than Jesus Christ and what He calls you to do.